There is a lot of rubbish in the media about ‘manifesting’ or ‘the law of attraction’. Like anything, it’s based on truth, but then gets hijacked by get-rich-quick schemes promising unlimited happiness, if you pay lots of money for a course. Or on the other side, religious zealots threaten if you try to ‘manifest anything’ without adhering to their way of thinking, you’ll burn in Hell! The best way to get around the latter is simply not to watch YouTube videos from fearmongering converts, but thankfully we don’t tend to do this in England (more an American thing).
The delightful Helena Woods (who has a brilliant video on how she manifested an apartment with her husband – her advice is just ‘write the goddamn list’ then focus on raising your energy and releasing resistance) recently uploaded a video on why she has no intention of living her native USA again. Mostly due to how you’re not allowed to believe different things to most of them. France (where she lives) has many Catholics, but they don’t tell her that she can’t follow her own profession (astrocartography) or beliefs (which are way different from flag-waving Americans who vote for Trump).
Manifesting and positive change is not ‘magic’. It’s simply replacing bad habits with good ones. If your life’s a car crash, it’s likely due to making a few bad decisions (you can get back on track by making a few good ones instead). You can’t change your soul’s journey (or manifest dreams if bombs are raising down on you in Ukraine).
But if you spend your life complaining about how the world has it in for you (victim mentality), you’ll find things won’t go well. If you get out of bed the wrong side and everything goes wrong for the rest of the day, doing this daily will kind of create a life in the same vain. At some point you have to accept responsiblitiy for your own actions (and past mistakes) and get on with life.
If someone has caused your life to dip, up to a point yes you may blame them. But after a while, you have to realise that whatever happened to you in the past, you have to take the actions to get yourself of old negative mindsets and ruts – because in this ruthless world, no-one else is going to do it for you. And the secret to any change is not ‘one big bang’ moment. It’s habits!
Leo Babauta is one of the world’s most successful bloggers (he writes about simple living). Not so long ago, he was living in his native Guam with his wife and six children. He was overweight, a smoker, had no energy, didn’t like his job and was unmotivated and depressed. So he simply started replacing bad habits with good ones. He and his family now live in San Francisco. He earns passive income, he gave up smoking, went vegan, took up running and is now healthy, happy and successful.
good habits are better than ‘being happy’
Many of us sensitive souls have good goals – until something goes wrong or we get upset by something. A good example is if you decide you’re going to start the day right, then watch the news (why it’s not a good idea generally). By the end of the bulletin, you’re traumatised by what you’ve seen and go into ‘what’s the point?’ mentality. How can you be happy when you’ve just seen what you’ve witnessed, with others suffering?
What works is habits. Build a morning routine, deciding what works for you: a beach walk with your dog, a morning smoothie and run, daily meditation and yoga, prayer time, a hot shower and self-care routine, chanting a Sanskrit mantra etc. Then you have ‘daily anchors’ to keep you focused, so everything doesn’t fall apart, when something goes wrong. Whatever happens, just keep to the routine. If you hate your job and want to study something, you’ll learn better if you do this for 30 minutes a day, rather than crash-study an online course in a week.
Yogi Cameron (and his lovely wife Yogini Jaima) are examples of inner peace. He is a former supermodel, and his wife used to be a Hollywood actress. Both of them live a simple (spiritual) happy life together in California. He promotes more a sense of ‘balance and contentment’ rather than uber-happiness. This is more in line with our natural inclination to be ‘slightly depressed’, rather than pretend we are happy all the time! He suggests a daily ritual is the backbone of a yogic life. This way he writes, ‘we stay in balance, even if the world around us isn’t’.
It’s interesting that ‘the happiest country in the world’ is Denmark, where one visitor said they all look like ‘they are in a state of national mourning’. One official when told the news replied ‘I’d hate to see what the other countries are like’. Very quiet and not ones to whoop and hoot everytime something good happens, they are in fact naturally happier. Unlike Americans, who go on anti-depressants then give big shiny smiles to everyone, pretending they are ‘positive and happy!’
The book Manifesting for Beginners is one of the few that actually talks sense, instead of woo-woo. Author Victoria Jackson turned her life around through building good habits – including making lists, practical actions and habit changes, along with helpful add-ons (like Emotional Freedom Technique and self-hypnosis). Rather than just ‘sending wishes to the cosmos’ which won’t work!
Anna Sayce writes that we all have primary soul lessons that we incarnated to learn. An example is making one’s own decisions. If you don’t make changes to address this, you could find life going in the opposite direction to how you want, due to attracting domineering people, who make decisions for you. If you don’t learn this lesson, the same thing happens again. A good example of this is women who keep having relationships with men who treat them badly, until they ‘break the cycle’.
tools to help you create good habits
LSW Mind Cards were developed by a therapist to help people live with intention, and create new habits for good mental health. Also find short self-hypnosis downloadable tracks. LSW Habit Notes is a 12-week undated tracking journal, to choose habits that can create goals, authentic to your new life.
Zelo Journal is a plastic-free planner (made in Yorkshire) designed to help change your life in small steps. Trusted by thousands of people, use it to gain clarity, to focus on the life you wish to live. Acting like a roadmap to keep you on track, you can then spend less time taking more effective steps, including blocking out time for rest and relaxation. Sold with lifetime usage metal pens and refillable cartridges.
