Some people seem to be just ‘born happy’, but for many of us, being optimistic (especially with the state of the world as it is right now) can be more challenging.
If you’re a natural Eeyore (the delightfully pessimistic donkey in Winnie-the-Pooh stories), it’s likely you won’t ever be a happy-clapped-white-teethed American. But there are ways to feel better!
Choose your company wisely. Rather than listen to narcissistic world leaders, turn off the news and just spend time around silly people! Or dogs – dogs are delightfully silly most of the time!
Be proud that you’re sensitive. It’s usually the highly-sensitive among us who get most upset at the goings-on in the world. We find it hard to be happy in a world of animal and child abuse, war and planetary destruction.
But actually that’s a good thing. Because if nobody was sensitive, then nobody would care. And then the world would be even worse than it is now.
Quotes from Eeyore (you’re in good company!)
It’s the only cloud in the sky and it’s drizzling, right on me. Somehow, I’m not surprised.
They haven’t got brains, any of them. Only grey fluff that’s blown into their heads, by mistake.
Could you ask your friend to do his exercises somewhere else? I shall be having lunch directly, and don’t want it bounced on just before I begin. A trifling matter, and fussy of me, but we all have our little ways..
Don’t ‘Force Yourself Happy’
This is something often told to us these days by New Age gurus, who say if we think happy, then we will be happy. Actually, your mind just tells you that you are pretending, and tells you to shut up. It’s far better to feel your way through heartbreak, to come out the other side.
It’s said that people in the USA have less depression. Yet actually behind the white shiny smiles, many who answer surveys are taking anti-depressants, so the answers are a bit skewed.
When ‘happy countries’ like Denmark and Finland are asked why they are so content, in fact, they say they are not. They are more like your mother used to say ‘don’t count your chickens until they are hatched’.
One Scandinavian MP said ‘If we’re the happiest nation, I’d hate to see what the others are like’. It’s said that Finns go around looking like they are in a state of national mourning. But that’s their natural way to look and be! And so they have low expectations, so are happier!
We like writer Paul Kingsnorth’s often morose look at the world, rather than the star-spangled happiness banner we are all supposed to be:
A year ago my brother (who is probably a better gardener than me, even though he insists on giving half his land over to mangelwurzels whatever they are) gave me a book on gardening by the moon.
I still haven’t done it, as I’m quote conservative (with a small C). Maybe that’s what an allotment does to you – gradually turns you into a grumpy old man in wellies and a donkey jacket.
Or maybe it just smacks of new age freakery. There are no wind chimes on my allotment. I do not sing to my seedlings. They just grow. Good old-fashioned common sense prevails. Biodynamic gardening has me running for the bar.
Call me terribly English. But I’m seeking vegetables. And perhaps a bit of fresh air and exercise. I’m not there to unblock my chakras. I haven’t got time. I’ve got to put horse poo on the bean rows. Leave me alone. Paul Kingsnorth
How to Be a (bit) More Optimistic
Try a Two-Minute Gratitude Pause
You don’t need to write things down in a gratitude journal. But just look up at the sky to watch a starling murmuration, or enjoy a hot cup of tea, or listen to the rain.
Limit the Doom-Scrolling
Yoga teacher Steve Ross once wrote that you could live in a cave for 10 years meditation. Then on return to LA, ten minutes of reading the newspapers could put you back into therapy.
Know what’s going on, but leave it at that. Rolling news will turn you into thinking everyone’s at war, abusing children and untrustworthy.
Surround Yourself with Hopeful People
Someone once said that you are the sum total of the five people you spend most time around. Others say actually it’s more wide-reaching. Like the sum total of the people they spend time with too.
Attitudes are catching. So if you spend time with people who are a bit more at peace and positive, it usually rubs off a bit. Even reading a book by someone with good energy can help.
